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Glory, halleluia, don't that put the screws right to ya
The government & the wife drove me insane
The wife wanted a patio so the old outhouse it had to go
Cause the government likes to keep all crap contained
So I commenced to the excavation
Blew my garden to damnation
Put a crater - where my veggies grew
No more turnips & potatoes;
Goodbye scarecrows & picnic tables
Goodbye plastic pink flamingos too
And then a leeching field was added,
Folks around said I was mad
For digging up all my fertile land
So then I took a building fit
With the patio lights & the barbecue pit
To please my wife - who's got the upper hand...
Glory, halleluia, don't that put the screws right to ya
The government & the wife drove me insane
The wife wanted a patio so the old outhouse it had to go
Cause the government likes to keep all crap contained
And then I added a brand new crapper
Drains & plugs & things that matter
Purpulating water through the vines
A lot of curse & smell & racket;
A mortgage in the high class bracket
Meaning I'll be poor for quite some time
So here I sit by my barbecue,
Wondering what the hell I'm doing
We've moved up in society of course
But I can't help but think we've strayed;
It's more primitive in ways
We cook outside, but now we crap indoors...
Glory, halleluia, don't that put the screws right to ya
The government & the wife drove me insane
The wife wanted a patio so the old outhouse it had to go
Cause the government likes to keep all crap contained